Things You Should Know
by Capn Nat
Summary: A joke list of the many things that you may have no clue about our beloved One Piece characters. Trust me, some of them you'll be surprized. Crack-list.


Things you should know…about One Piece characters...basically a joke list about random possibilities for different people throughout the story and what their little secrets could be...with the growth of the series this may grow as well...not sure yet...

**Straw Hat Crew**

Luffy: not actually related to monkeys

Zoro: previous yakuza member

Nami: allergic to lemons

Usopp: BG (baby gangsta)

Sanji: listens to Bare Naked Ladies (the band you numbskulls)

Chopper: hides a pbj sandwich under his hat

Robin: uses cliff notes

Franky: wish he owned a pair of jeans

Brooke: teases his hair every morning

**Pirates**

Shanks: the scars are from a cat (Kuro?)

Ben Beckman: likes books featuring Fabio

Lucky Roux: on a diet

Yasopp: has a thing for long noses

Alvida: has a (creepy) thing for younger guys

Buggy the Clown: Krusty's stand-in

Mohji: not a cat person

Cabaji: ran away from home to join the circus

Kuro: the scariest gangsta you'll ever see

Django: looks up to Michael Jackson

Sham & Buchi: long lost twin brothers

Don Kreig: Don Vito in disguise

Ghin: has a secret man-crush on Sanji

Pearl: likes oysters, hates clams

Hawkeye: pimp

Arlong: likes sushi

Kurobi: likes pina-coladas and walks on the beach

Hatchi: likes to work with his hands

Chew: never has been kissed

Dorry: a religious man

Brogy: swore off peanut butter

Wapol: is tired of honorifics

Chess: favorite movie is "Little Nemo" (not "Finding Nemo")

Kuromarimo: uses jell, not hair spray

Bellamy: prefers water beds

Sarguiss: at the point of suicide

Edward Newgate: dislikes hospitals

Portgas D. Ace: sleeps through movies

Marshall D. Teach: has a black hole for a heart

Doc Q: always gets right back on the saddle when he falls

Van Auger: lost his contacts

Jesus Burgess: once worked for WWE

Lafitte: prefers lattes to mochas

Oimo & Kaashi: own a pony corral

**Navy**

Ax-Hand Morgan: uses steroids

Helmeppo: is a daddies boy (but we already knew that)

Coby: dyes his hair twice a month

Nezumi: surprisingly doesn't like cheese

Smoker: on the patch

Tashigi: hides a Zoro figurine under her bead

Hina: hides her fear of tight places

Fullbody: can't break dance

Aokiji: lived in Alaska for a few years

Spandine: would be proud of his son

Spandam: can synthesize with "Man in the Iron Mask"

Rob Lucci: mafia boss

Kaku: has had a nose job

Jyabura: howls at the moon

Kalifa: skips showers regularly

Kumadori: wears a wig

Blueno: looking for the door to his future

Fukuro: picked up a gossip forum

Nero: is back with his own kind

Jerry: the forgotten Ninja Turtle

Wanze: his dumplings never come out right

T-Bone: teaches at an elementary school

Jaguar D. Saul: likes comic books

Monkey D. Garb: hates family reunions

**Baroque Works**

Crocodile: defiantly a gangsta

Mr. 1: cringes at the sound of Styrofoam

Miss Doublefinger: doesn't get much business in her shop

Bon Clay: hermaphrodite?

Mr. 3: uses lotion due to his dry hends

Miss GoldenWeek: is secretly Picasso

Mr. 4: bats for the Diamond Backs

Miss Merry Christmas: hates Groundhog's day

Mr. 5: eats his boogers

Miss Valentine: hates scales

Mr. 6 & Miss Mother's Day: feel forgotten

Mr. 7: copies Fat Albert's "hey hey hey" for fun

Miss Father's Day: gets warts, and likes it…

Mr. 8: plays jazz at the local café on Tuesdays

Miss Monday: won woman's body builders award for best in Country

Mr. 9: says he's king of the house

Mr. 10 & Miss Tuesday: didn't make the cut

Mr. 11 & Miss Saturday: escape artists

Mr. 12 & Miss Thursday: fell asleep on the job

Mr. 13: got a contract with TokyoPop

Miss Friday: has bad luck

**Other**

Makino: older then she looks

Heguma: seen a Pink Floyd concert

Rika: sells sugary rice balls by the dozen

Boodle: hates when kids play on his lawn

Chouchou: started his own pet shop (hard to imagine, huh?)

Miss Kaya: is half black

Pepper: is a pepper

Onion: feels eating onion soup is cannibalistic

Carrot: had to loose the bangs

Merry: counts sheep in his sleep

Chef Zeff: wears a different peg lag per weekday

Patty: hates hambugers

Carne: use to be a cholo

Johnny: lost his shades

Yosaku: stole his headband from Naruto

Nijiko: has a tramp-stamp

Genzo: looses his hat in the wind a lot

Laboon: all blubber (but are not whales anyway)

Dalton: rebellious to his mother

Dr. Kureha: prides herself for never needing a facelift

Dr. Herulock: likes Shitake mushrooms

Eneru: needs shock therapy

Ohm: meditates to the peaceful sounds of Daft Punk

Paulie: wants a cracker

_Hope that was a fun little list for you, if you have ideas feel free to tell me. Thank you for taking the time to check this out._


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